Self-Awareness is such an abstract idea that it’s hard to really grasp the meaning of the word. The idea of practicing self-awareness intends to bring to light observations of oneself through introspection and reflection.
These can be simple observations from; how you breathe, to how you dress, to how you look, to how you act, and to how you’re perceived. It can also be more complex things like; your deepest desires, your unfinished goals, your real motives and weird enough, who you’re talking to when you’re talking to yourself. That surely is a conundrum worth trying to understand better.
My intention here is to create a roadmap for your self-awareness related to any characteristic about yourself currently and in the future. It can be used for any of these simple or complex observations you may need to unearth about yourself. I see it as a useful tool for self-improvement. It is the act of paying attention.
Part 1 – You are Here!
Part 2 – Where To First?
Part 3 – But Why?
Part 4 – Ready or Not!
Part 5 – Are We There Yet?
Ready or Not!
In our last few blog posts, we’ve outlined the Self-Awareness roadmap and expanded the ideas of Where we are, Where we want to go, and Why. As I have previously stated, knowing these factors allows you to create a plan. But, that first step in a new direction is always the hardest. So, in order to choose a good destination or a strong goal, you have to know first, where you are, second, where you want to go, and finally, What is your Why before you can make a plan.
This plan is where life exists. This plan is where “the rubber meets the road” and you will face the obstacles that will become your path. It is possible to over-analyze and get analysis paralysis with Self-Awareness. At some point you just have to throw your hat in the ring and get the ball rolling. Ready or not, here I come.
Here is the outline of the Self-Awareness Roadmap for reference.
First, Who or where are you? (You are Here)
- Clarify your position in Reality,
- Accept Responsibility for that position.
- Resolve to improve your position in life.
- Where do you want to go?
Second, Where would you like to go, who would you like to be? (Where to First)
- Ultimate Destinations
- Pay Attention to your biggest goals, dreams and wishes.
- Pay Attention to your current reality.
- Choosing a Destination.
- Can you get there in one step or is this going to be a multi-step process?
- Ultimate Destinations
Third, Why do you want to go? (But Why)
- Exploring your why
- Understanding your primary why?
- Making decisions with your why in mind.
- Is your Why congruent with your Who, What, Where and How?
- Exploring your why
Fourth, How are you going to get there? (Ready or Not)
- What’s your travel potential?
- What luggage must go with you?
- What do you need to prepare for your trip?
- What obstacle must you account for?
- What does the environment look like?
- What checkpoints will signal that you’re on the right track?
- What’s your travel potential?
Fifth, What’s next? (Are we there yet).
- Level up your Self-Awareness with reflection.
- Build on top of your current successes.
- Practicing Self-Awareness never ends.
What is your Travel Potential?
Pay Attention to your potential. Only you know how far you can go. Your goal must include a plan that you can achieve. It has to be realistic.
“A goal without a plan is just a wish”
Assuming you know where you are, let’s set up some parameters for your journey. What is your ultimate destination? How far can you go from the location “You are Here” towards your ultimate destination at one given time? If it’s not your ultimate destination, then what are some of your checkpoints along the way? How will you be traveling? What luggage has to go with you?
Your potential is a major component of self-awareness. Only you can answer the question above with the most accuracy. Intelligent planning of your future destinations will be based on these questions above. Your Why as previously discussed is the driving force that will ultimately determine your potential. I am of the idea, that nothing is impossible if you want it badly enough. A goal needs a plan and the first thing you need to know about a plan is what is the best way to get to this goal from where you are?
What is the mode of transportation?
Planes, trains, and automobiles. To continue with our analogy of traveling to Niagara, we know we could fly to New York in about 6 hours. This is the fastest most efficient means of travel currently but may be more complicated if you and your family are traveling together with dogs and a load of luggage. A car may be a better mode of transport in this case. We could all walk there as well, but this would be terribly inefficient. Only you can decide what is the best mode of transportation based upon your reality. So Pay Attention.
This idea of “modes of transport” can be used as an analogy for what tools you need to get the job done. For example, I am currently trying to improve my relationship with God. I had to decide what is going to be the best way to achieve this goal. I chose to use a multitude of tools and modes to better my chances of success.
- First, I chose simply to create a habit of praying every morning. This act is so simple and requires no tools, only myself, and persistence.
- Second, I have downloaded the Bible App. I use this tool to receive one short verse every day. When my mind is overwhelmed it often helps to have a thought to catch onto. It helps me to instill the routine of prayer every day as well as dig a bit deeper into my faith.
- Third, for many years I have wanted to read the bible all the way through. I have started programs that lay out exactly how this can be done on a day by day basis in one year. In each instance, I only made it a few weeks before other “priorities” took over. This year, 2021, I have signed up and subscribed to read “The Bible in a Year” using a podcast featuring Father Mike Schmitz.
I have applied simple tools and more complex, technically advanced tools to help me achieve a better relationship with God.
Whatever mode you choose, practice is the only way to improve. “Routines Build Dreams”
Now that we have chosen the mode of transport, there can be so many other obstacles or questions that need to be solved. If you’ve decided on a road trip, then is your car in good enough shape to make the journey? Any repairs needed before you drive across the country? How are the tires? What luggage do you need to take? Will all of your luggage fit? Can you make it across the country without your driver’s side blinker working?
Using the same idea, what prerequisites do you need before you decide to become a doctor, or before you purchase that new car or open a new business?
What luggage must you carry?
This question can really complicate your ability to achieve one goal versus another. The luggage you are carrying often must go with you and only you can decide what is worth taking or leaving. This is also why it’s easier to set goals and life plans at a younger age when you have accumulated less luggage.
Here’s the deal, you shouldn’t surrender any current, relevant responsibilities in the quest for new ones. On the flipside, Self-Awareness and paying attention to responsibilities that no longer serve you, or you them, can really free up your abilities to travel. Whatever your new plan or goal may be, you need to bring along with you certain products made from old plans or achieved goals or even the unintended consequences of the two.
I’m not saying you can’t evade your responsibilities, but I am saying that there will always be a cost to evading them, even if they no longer serve their purpose.
It would be nice to travel off the cuff and without needing to prepare at all. Grabbing meals as you go and throwing away used clothing as you buy new outfits for the day. This is obviously something that could be done but isn’t the least bit responsible. It isn’t responsible, but it sure is convenient. Something that we humans in the 21st century really seem to be striving for. Read my previous blog post on how convenience is making us a weaker species. 12 Immune Boosters to Covid-19, Chaos, and Convenience.
In our world of convenience today, many will abandon their vows in marriage, leave their kids to be raised by others or let their health go to shit in the pursuit of something new, shiny, more desirable, and EASY. I am not saying you have to carry around everything from your past, but you should do your best to juggle the commitments you have made until you have fulfilled your promises. However long they may be. There is always a cost to how we navigate the obstacles that make up our actions and decisions.
The grass is greener where you water it.
What obstacles will you face on your road?
Obstacles are part of the plan. You can’t escape them unless maybe we are talking about short-term, simple goals. Anything a bit complex will usually present with some obstacle to your plan. These obstacles may be physical, like a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest, or emotional, like the fear of failure and rejection we all know.
Each mode of travel, assuming there is more than one way to achieve your goal, will carry along with it some inherent risks. Do your best to foresee future risks and prepare for them. Don’t forget to investigate how challenging the road may be, the terrain you’re up against and the climates you may encounter.
This is where the fun begins. And If it’s not fun or pushing you, is there really a point to it? A goal is meaningless if it doesn’t change you. Ultimately it’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey.
Is this a well-traveled plan taken by many and easy to follow or is this the road less taken? Will the road be clear or will you be making your own way as you go? Will the plan need to be loose and easily adaptable?
Being aware of your environment is critical to Self-Awareness. It is critical to your life and may impose on your ultimate destination. I know it’s kind of outside the realm of self-awareness, but it can greatly impact your position in life. Pay Attention to the environment you’re in. Change it if necessary to accomplish your goal.
Just like climbing Mt. Everest in the winter would carry with it high risk, so does opening up a new restaurant during the Covid lockdowns of 2020. Knowing your climate and being able to forecast the changing weather can be potentially life-saving.
Mistakes will be made. Own them and learn from them is the only way through the path. Resist the temptations to take shortcuts. Setting up some guardrails and checkpoints along the way to ensure your trip is a success.
“Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the face.” -Mike Tyson
Checkpoints along the way
You’ve set your goals and picked your destination. A complex goal such as becoming a doctor or being a good human will have multiple steps and checkpoints along the way. These checkpoints are needed to keep you on the right track. To measure your success in relation to your ultimate goal.
Obviously, the checkpoints will vary from goal to goal.
On a road trip, you will be on a numbered highway, hit certain landmarks along the way, and will even have to pause to sleep.
College degrees will require you to attend and understand specialized classes each semester in order to advance to the next level.
Ready or Not, at some point, you have to hit the road and start the journey. Just put one foot in front of the other and always Pay Attention.
One Adjustment Action Steps
Know where “You Are Here” is exactly. Review the blog post on Removing Distractions, Taking Responsibility and Resolving to see it through. Not just a fad but a lifestyle of change and infinite potential.
Where do you want to go or who do you want to be in life? Start with the end in mind. In the blog post Write Your Reality I have some tools to help you tease this out. It doesn’t need to be a final draft, just a rough draft for your life’s destinations. Take the OATH and commit to improving your life.
Your Why is crucial to your life. Understand it better than anyone. There are many great books on finding your why by authors such as Simon Sinek and Seth Godin to name a few.
How has an infinite amount of possibilities. No two are the same. I’ve written a few blog posts explaining how Routines build Dreams, how having a Grit Mindset pushes you through barriers and how to build immunity to weakness.
Practice Paying Attention to everything in your life. Pay Attention in a prioritized manner from the top down.
Journal daily. It doesn’t need to be extensive or formal. Just write down your thoughts daily before they’re gone. Document it or it didn’t happen!
Are we there yet? The answer is no. We are never there because the goalpost keeps moving. We are never there because self-awareness and self-improvement are practices that should never cease.
Nick the DC
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